It all started years ago, probably when I was in high school, and I caught a glimpse of a fitness competition on TV. A superfit, gorgeous, happy girl jumping around the stage. She was tan, toned, and looked to happy to be her.
Fast forward early 2000's, when I was watching True Life: I Want a Perfect Body. A Harvard PhD student, Rebecca, decided to chase her dream of competing in a fitness competition. She went from average to lean and mean, but only after a grueling regimen of working out and diet. I distinctly remember the tired Rebecca sitting at her kitchen table, scooping egg yolks out of a dozen hard-boiled eggs, then eating all of the whites. It looked vile, and I can only assume it smelled horrendous; I wanted to be her.
So here I am. A girl with an insane love affair for all food vegan and carby. A girl whose favorite part of the day is coming home after a long day of work, a killer workout, and finishing off dinner only to eat half a roll of Biscoff cookies, a 6-pack of Oreos, and tablespoon after tablespoon of Teddy Natural Chunky Peanut Butter.
But I am also a girl who has always wanted to be smaller and leaner. Sure, there's nothing wrong with a size 6, which I have been since I was 14. But I've wanted to get rid of the "excess." You know, the jiggle on your tummy in step class, the overflow over your jeans around your waist in the back, and the flabby section around your knees.
More importantly though, is the chance to obtain a true, difficult goal. I graduated from a top 20 University, fine. I got the MBA in 9 months. Whatever. I passed the grueling Boston Firefighter physical exam. Okay. But this is the goal that has been hovering over my head. This is the goal that I've given up on before I really tried. If I can obtain this feat, I know that anything is possible. To take control over the ever-ending food temptations that surround us all. To know that though eating whatever I want gives me immense satisfaction, that it is a fleeting joy that leaves me dissatisfied in so many other ways.
I want more. I want more from myself, and I want more for myself. I command such a stronghold on every other aspect of my life, I cannot allow this to continue to be my nemesis for the rest of my existence.
So I took the plunge, and I will compete November 5. I'm scared, I'm excited, but I'm most of all proud that I opted to act, instead of simply wax poetic.
I have always followed my own mantra of "Instead of standing around talking about something, just do it already." This is the only feat I blabbed on about, but never moved forward.
I'm moving now, baby!